Chronicle

The Truth will set you free indeed! I no longer stand in condemnation before my God and Master! He has forgiven me of all my sin--past, present, and future! I am no longer in bondage to this force we call sin! I am a new creature! I am restored back to what I was originally created for--to glorify and reflect God's glory! He continues to chip away every area of my life that is not like Christ, until one day when I stand before Him, I will be like Him! I am a citizen of heaven! He chooses not to view me for what I am here on this earth (aka a sinful human being), rather He sees Christ in me and for who I will be some day when I stand before Him. I have a mission! I have been commissioned by Him to live my life in such a way that represents Him to the unbelieving world! "Go into all the world and preach the gospel". This is a high calling, but how many times do I misrepresent Him? How many times do I allow my pride get in the way of the opportunities presented to me each day to share my faith? How many people will I have to look in the face with tears in my eyes and with no excuse tell them I'm sorry for not telling them the answer to why they had a void in their life that nothing would fill? How many souls have I let slip away without taking the time to go out of my way to build a relationship with the outcasts? I am guilty, guilty, guilty! Every day I allow these opportunities to slip out of sight and I blatantly misrepresent Christ to these souls I encounter! Do I really believe that every knee will bow before God? What am I doing to really make a difference? Jesus loved me so much that He was willing to experience separation from His Father or Abba for the first and only time in His eternal essence and being. My sin was laid on Him and He paid the price for my soul with His blood. The least I can do is give my life to Him fully! Go wherever He wants me to go! Do whatever He wants me to do! Maybe it means I will go without the luxuries of a good paying job! Maybe I will have to suffer physically or be ridiculed publicly! But so be it! "Whoever desires to live godly will be persecuted!" That's a promise! I am a man who has lived for twenty-three years without fully giving every area of my life to Him! I worry about things that I shouldn't worry about! How many times do I pray without faith? How many times do I read the Bible not really believing that God is speaking to me? I have a personal relationship with the Creator of the universe! I can "come boldly before His throne" anytime I please! That's a privilege that many of the Old Testament prophets, priests, and patriarchs didn't have! Better yet, His Spirit lives within me! I am commanded to be filled with the Spirit! The very Spirit that raised Christ from the dead lives within me! Why do I doubt? Please, God, give me faith! Give me passion! But most of all, give me a desire to love! I cannot help but be drawn to you! The more I know you, the more I don't understand! But at the same time, I cannot help but stand in amazement that you love me! And I "know" that you present to me so many opportunities to represent this love to others! But I choose to spit in your faith and abuse the grace that you have given me so freely! God forbid! But for some reason, you continually draw me back to you! Everytime I give into the passions of men, you stand ready to receive me back into your arms with outstretched hands showing me the scars! Need I see more? You took upon yourself the punishment that I should have received! I should be damned to spend an eterninity in Hell! You chose to experience the separation from God for a temporary time so that I would not have to spend an eternity in separation paying for the debt that I rightfully owed! I don't understand! This blows my mind! What can I ever do to repay you! Even my "righteousness is as filthy rags"! I cannot possibly earn favor with you! It's futile! There's only one thing that I can do! Take what you have given me and live my life in such a way that other's can see You living in me! There's nothing in me that is worthy! But you are worthy! You chose to come to this earth so that I could catch but a glimpse of what it is to love my brothers and sisters, outcasts and sinners! You showed me what it meant to speak to a known whore at a well and have the courage to open your mouth and proclaim to her that only You can satisfy and to go and sin no more! You showed me what it meant to be accused of being a "wine-bibber" and a friend of sinners! You took the time to get to know these souls! You saw them not for who they were, but for who they would become complete in your love! You showed me what it means to surround yourself around a group of believers who were committed to Your cause--the Gospel! You showed me what it meant to weep and cry over souls that would not accept you, and a dear friend that had died! You showed me what it means to be beaten to a bloody pulp, stripped naked, spit on, humiliated, nailed to a tree, but ultimately proclaim--"Abba, forgive them, for they know not what they do!". Just as God made His appeal through Christ, You are making your appeal to man through me and the body of Christ! I cannot do this on my own, but You are continually taking me by the hand and showing me that I am not alone. You have given me parents and a family who have taught me to love You and Your Word! You have given me friends devoted to You and Your cause and like "iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." I believe that You have given me a wife someday that will be devoted to You and Your cause and together we will be commited to growing closer to You and what You have! You have given me time! Precious time to take each second and make it sacred to take what is temporal and turn into the eternal! I am on this earth to impress no one! I am only here to be vessel in Your hands and accomplish what You have, so that one day or moment I can stand before you and here you say, "Well done, my good and faithful servant! Enter now into the joy of the Lord!" As I continue to live this paradox called life, may this forever be my prayer, Amen!